Perfect immunity

You hit me painfully hard today,

So painful that I wanted to retaliate;

I wanted to knock you on the head,

But you had a beautifully made hair;

Ok, on the protrusion above the slit of the skirt,

But that would be seen as sexual harassment;

How about around and in front?

Buh then, I’d be seen as a pervert!

I thought of hitting you in the area around the navel,

Gosh! Your womb is somewhere there;

Good, I then thought of aiming high,

And unleashing the pain that’ll make you cry;

Buh sadly, those areas were tender and soft,

I’ll only get aroused - not a very good spot;

Hey dude! How about you hit her on her legs ?

Jeez! What a stupid thought, that’ll have no effect;

Then came the great idea of squeezing two fingernails around your skin,

Oh God! You’re so gonna yell out and scream!

People around would think I wanted to make a forced entry,

‘But I can’t just stand here like this!’

My arms around you, I let out my hurt in one hot kiss;

‘Here’s your chance! Bite her in the lips, let her feel some pain’

I could have, but then I remembered that I’ll have to kiss you again!

Do not hurt me again cutie, cuz that’ll be iniquity,

Now that you’ve realized your perfect immunity.

Written by John Eiyemi