For today’s shalaye, we’re going the nollywood route of remembrance inside remembrance. You gorrit? Leggo
“I really do not understand you people o, you mean you want to go and pay that much for pre-degree in OAU over your daughter?”
Mr Mofete swallowed another fist-sized morsel of pupuru, complete with a ‘paraing’ scoop of efo riro and periwinkles.
Mrs Ajayi’s eyes had began to narrow (that woman get short fuse ehn! ) and I knew it had nothing to do with the noisy blurp blurp sounds that accompanied his swallows. If he knew what was good for him, he would have finished the food he was offered and left for his house jeje (even Mr Ajayi’s gaze had began to sharpen, spelling trouble) but the ogbanje spirit inside him never relents. He must sha enter trouble ni sha!
He delivered his banger.
“I mean, send her to NCE or something, she’s just a girl, sebi obirin lasan ni…..”
5…4…3….2…
“Ehn Daddy Ope! Ki le so yen noh?”. Mrs Ajayi looked ready to pounce. She’s a girl, nigbayen nko? Did we come begging her fees from you?……………”.
By the time the conversation was done, I ‘pirried’ him. Harmattan don sama the fufu wey dey hin hand so tey the thing for don hard like concrete. But I pitied his daughters even more.
That’s no fiction, I was a young girl of 14 when that happened. I had finished secondary school the previous year……….( yes I finished secondary school at 13, forget o, I used to be extra sharp) and the higher institution hunt had begun.
That day, I was grateful for the kind of parents I got. You would never know the weight of some things until you were at the receiving end.
I imagine Mr Mofete was my dad. A door would have been shut in my face because my genitals were shaped like a split ‘agbalumo’ (African cherry I guess, I’ono ) and not a cucumber. That would have been my only disqualification. Intellectual prowess don’t count. While there is nothing wrong with going to a College of Education, there’s absolutely everything wrong with me going because I’m “just a girl”. “Obirin lasan”. How I resent those words. I do not believe there is anything ‘lasan’ about ‘Obirin’. That’s an oxymoron. An epic one paapaa.
Oya, fast forward to last week, this remembrance actually triggered the one above……..
My friend told me a tale of how a guy wailed and wailed because she had gotten off the vehicle for him to get in so she could reclaim her seat by the window on a public transport. In a bus they both boarded. That they both were going to pay for. That didn’t belong to the father of neither of them. Talk about the most mundane of things. The guy couldn’t understand why a ‘gurl’ would act that way and so he went on and on.
“I’m not a f******t o, but I don’t know why anyone would think I can’t take any seat I like because I’m a girl.” she said.
Erhen? So na me fit carry am for head abi? Women liberation international. Okay na. When she continued to look at me, waiting for a response no doubt, I just told her I wouldn’t want to soil her with these opinions of mine that could be considered f******t o. Kapish?!
Got me wondering though. Got me wondering why an ideology that has done so much for my gender could be treated like a virus by some.
An idea that has given multitudes a chance at life. We can vote, we can drive, we got to universities, get corporate jobs, you think it’s beans abi?
Heck, I even have a blog despite the fact that I’m technologically challenged! Abi you don’t know there was a time when a woman could not write under her own name ni? If you must write, you could only get it published if you used a man’s name. What other ideology deserves a pot of jollof rice from us in appreciation na?
Maybe it’s because of the over-gim-gim that has been attached to it though. Maybe because some think being a f******t means you cannot even prepare the pot of jollof rice mentioned above. A typical girl shies away from the ‘F’ word because she thinks it makes her unmarriageable. I continue to use the ‘F’ word because some ladies would rather refer to themselves as fucktards than f******ts.
Perhaps what you see when you hear the ‘F’ WORD is a man-dissing, angry, bitter woman with distorted facial features, howling and scowling. Shouting the roof down with spittle flying all over about how ALL MEN ARE FOOLS.
To that I’ve got these to say:
– EVIL HAS GOT NO GENDER.
-Feminists who throw the male gender under the bus are just as bad as their misogynist counterparts.
And about the head of the home part. Have you seen how all these head head people look after some years in office? Former President Jonathan, Former Governor Fashola, even President Obama sef despite all the magnificence of the title and office. They look like they’ve been sucked with a straw. Why would I want to be head na? When I can remain fresh and fly?
But I also posit that some guys don’t even know what it means to be the head. The just want to be head for shoulder pad purposes. Skinny legs in pencil jeans. Don’t even know that life is more than having a pair of tims and 20,000 naira in your bank account. Wants every gurl on the street to ‘submit’ to him. Smh. No words really.
F******ts don’t wanna cook, sweep, back baby….I tire joorh. The ‘F’ word is word not just about stew and omi obe o. It’s way way way ‘beyond’ all these things o. Let’s talk real issues for a sec shall we?
Like abuse and harassment, fairness in career opportunities……..do you know that there was a time women were paid lesser than their male counterparts on the same job?
Issues like the girl child’s dream getting thwarted because you submit her to penis when what she should be handling is a pencil (child marriage).
You still do not see the need for the movement yeah?
Faulting the ideology because some people have tailored it to suit some of their twisted issues is like saying family is a terrible thing because you’ve seen parental flaws and failures.
Thinking this ‘F’ word is a waste of time because if women were meant to be equal to men, there would have been no reason for these ‘rights’ in the first place is like someone wondering why black people fought for independence. If they were supposed to be free at all, would they have been slaves in the first place?
The one that I can never understand is when they say a girl got raped and you hear some people go “she most likely dressed inappropriately”. So if a gurl dresses inappropriately you have a right to rape her?
In kindergarten English, if I do not put my eraser in my school bag you have a right to steal it?
I kent understand some people. Really just kent.
#I_believe_in_the_girl_child
#My_brand_of_feminism
For more from this writer click here
“I really do not understand you people o, you mean you want to go and pay that much for pre-degree in OAU over your daughter?”
Mr Mofete swallowed another fist-sized morsel of pupuru, complete with a ‘paraing’ scoop of efo riro and periwinkles.
Mrs Ajayi’s eyes had began to narrow (that woman get short fuse ehn! ) and I knew it had nothing to do with the noisy blurp blurp sounds that accompanied his swallows. If he knew what was good for him, he would have finished the food he was offered and left for his house jeje (even Mr Ajayi’s gaze had began to sharpen, spelling trouble) but the ogbanje spirit inside him never relents. He must sha enter trouble ni sha!
He delivered his banger.
“I mean, send her to NCE or something, she’s just a girl, sebi obirin lasan ni…..”
5…4…3….2…
“Ehn Daddy Ope! Ki le so yen noh?”. Mrs Ajayi looked ready to pounce. She’s a girl, nigbayen nko? Did we come begging her fees from you?……………”.
By the time the conversation was done, I ‘pirried’ him. Harmattan don sama the fufu wey dey hin hand so tey the thing for don hard like concrete. But I pitied his daughters even more.
That’s no fiction, I was a young girl of 14 when that happened. I had finished secondary school the previous year……….( yes I finished secondary school at 13, forget o, I used to be extra sharp) and the higher institution hunt had begun.
That day, I was grateful for the kind of parents I got. You would never know the weight of some things until you were at the receiving end.
I imagine Mr Mofete was my dad. A door would have been shut in my face because my genitals were shaped like a split ‘agbalumo’ (African cherry I guess, I’ono ) and not a cucumber. That would have been my only disqualification. Intellectual prowess don’t count. While there is nothing wrong with going to a College of Education, there’s absolutely everything wrong with me going because I’m “just a girl”. “Obirin lasan”. How I resent those words. I do not believe there is anything ‘lasan’ about ‘Obirin’. That’s an oxymoron. An epic one paapaa.
Oya, fast forward to last week, this remembrance actually triggered the one above……..
My friend told me a tale of how a guy wailed and wailed because she had gotten off the vehicle for him to get in so she could reclaim her seat by the window on a public transport. In a bus they both boarded. That they both were going to pay for. That didn’t belong to the father of neither of them. Talk about the most mundane of things. The guy couldn’t understand why a ‘gurl’ would act that way and so he went on and on.
“I’m not a f******t o, but I don’t know why anyone would think I can’t take any seat I like because I’m a girl.” she said.
Erhen? So na me fit carry am for head abi? Women liberation international. Okay na. When she continued to look at me, waiting for a response no doubt, I just told her I wouldn’t want to soil her with these opinions of mine that could be considered f******t o. Kapish?!
Got me wondering though. Got me wondering why an ideology that has done so much for my gender could be treated like a virus by some.
An idea that has given multitudes a chance at life. We can vote, we can drive, we got to universities, get corporate jobs, you think it’s beans abi?
Heck, I even have a blog despite the fact that I’m technologically challenged! Abi you don’t know there was a time when a woman could not write under her own name ni? If you must write, you could only get it published if you used a man’s name. What other ideology deserves a pot of jollof rice from us in appreciation na?
Maybe it’s because of the over-gim-gim that has been attached to it though. Maybe because some think being a f******t means you cannot even prepare the pot of jollof rice mentioned above. A typical girl shies away from the ‘F’ word because she thinks it makes her unmarriageable. I continue to use the ‘F’ word because some ladies would rather refer to themselves as fucktards than f******ts.
Perhaps what you see when you hear the ‘F’ WORD is a man-dissing, angry, bitter woman with distorted facial features, howling and scowling. Shouting the roof down with spittle flying all over about how ALL MEN ARE FOOLS.
To that I’ve got these to say:
– EVIL HAS GOT NO GENDER.
-Feminists who throw the male gender under the bus are just as bad as their misogynist counterparts.
And about the head of the home part. Have you seen how all these head head people look after some years in office? Former President Jonathan, Former Governor Fashola, even President Obama sef despite all the magnificence of the title and office. They look like they’ve been sucked with a straw. Why would I want to be head na? When I can remain fresh and fly?
But I also posit that some guys don’t even know what it means to be the head. The just want to be head for shoulder pad purposes. Skinny legs in pencil jeans. Don’t even know that life is more than having a pair of tims and 20,000 naira in your bank account. Wants every gurl on the street to ‘submit’ to him. Smh. No words really.
F******ts don’t wanna cook, sweep, back baby….I tire joorh. The ‘F’ word is word not just about stew and omi obe o. It’s way way way ‘beyond’ all these things o. Let’s talk real issues for a sec shall we?
Like abuse and harassment, fairness in career opportunities……..do you know that there was a time women were paid lesser than their male counterparts on the same job?
Issues like the girl child’s dream getting thwarted because you submit her to penis when what she should be handling is a pencil (child marriage).
You still do not see the need for the movement yeah?
Faulting the ideology because some people have tailored it to suit some of their twisted issues is like saying family is a terrible thing because you’ve seen parental flaws and failures.
Thinking this ‘F’ word is a waste of time because if women were meant to be equal to men, there would have been no reason for these ‘rights’ in the first place is like someone wondering why black people fought for independence. If they were supposed to be free at all, would they have been slaves in the first place?
The one that I can never understand is when they say a girl got raped and you hear some people go “she most likely dressed inappropriately”. So if a gurl dresses inappropriately you have a right to rape her?
In kindergarten English, if I do not put my eraser in my school bag you have a right to steal it?
I kent understand some people. Really just kent.
#I_believe_in_the_girl_child
#My_brand_of_feminism
WRITTEN BY CHRISTIE OLAMIDE
For more from this writer click here
No comments :
Post a Comment